It Happened. Now What?

If you are here you are probably going through what I would define as one of the most difficult times in a person’s life – getting divorced. You are feeling everything from shock, anger, sadness, anxiety, confusion, grief, and possibly guilt or guilty relief. It may all feel surreal! While every divorce situation is unique, these are common feelings and all part of the emotional journey that comes with the end of a marriage. And although you’re likely getting a lot of advice from well-meaning friends and family… everybody thinks they understand…the truth is, only you know what it feels like to go through your divorce.

One of the reasons I do what I do is because while I don’t know what it feels like to go through your divorce, I know what it felt like to go through my own divorce. All the practical and emotional aspects that I needed to figure out while experiencing the loss. At the end of the day, we do not get married intending to divorce. We all set sail on the ship of marriage full of hopes and dreams. Whether you want to divorce or not, it is still a roller coaster of emotions.

I was grieving the loss, had fears of what was next for me, and also felt overwhelmed. It was hard to juggle my feelings while at the same time dealing with so many practical, financial, and legal aspects needing to be addressed. The entire divorce process can be emotionally challenging to navigate. When I was in your shoes, I didn’t know where to begin. I started to navigate it myself and it was difficult. Finally, I got support and it made a difference. And while all of it didn’t necessarily get easier immediately, it did get more manageable and clearer. I started to feel more grounded, empowered, and more in control of what was happening in my life. I ultimately charted my next steps and created my new empowered and more fulfilled version professionally, personally, for my son, and eventually in my new healthy partnership! This is what I want for you!

Choose Not To Divorce Alone

I have worked extensively with individuals and couples going through a divorce, and no matter how painful the divorce is, it is always possible to write a new story and create your own new version. You may not feel like this right now – but we will get you there! I don’t just want to support and guide you through your divorce (which I will do) but, I also want to empower you to chart your next steps and create a new life after divorce. You do not need to do this alone and you can transform your life after divorce.

What Does It Look Like?

PROCESS | HEAL | CREATE

PROCESS: DIVORCE RECOVERY COACHING

You are in it and divorce can feel complicated.  There is all of the legal stuff and the emotional aspect of ending a relationship you thought was yours forever.  On top of it, there is helping yourself and your children understand this, figuring out finances, and working through all the decisions involved in this big life change.  As a divorce coach, psychotherapist, and lawyer, I realize divorce encompasses all of this and more. Whether you are considering a divorce or on the receiving end of a request for divorce from your spouse, I understand firsthand the emotional impact and overwhelm and want to help you successfully navigate the divorce process.  Each situation is unique and so are you! Although, where you are in your journey will determine the kind of work we will do together:

• Navigate the confusing and overwhelming legal divorce proceedings. What is involved and what are the right options for you.
• Organize your thoughts, feelings, and documents to practically and emotionally prepare you to successfully handle the divorce.
• Told to communicate your wants and needs in the Divorce
• Utilize tools for effective parent communication with your children
• Utilize tools for effective communication and conflict resolution with your ex-partner.
• If a parent – Manage effectively situations that might continue to bring the two of you together, such as co-parenting.
• Develop healthy boundaries and new “rules of engagement” to guide your future interactions with your ex.
• Make meaning from what happened in the relationship, and learn how that can inform your future relationships.

HEAL: DIVORCE RECOVERY

The process of recovery from divorce usually includes some grieving. You have to mourn the passing of the relationship, learn to let go of the future you’d envisioned for your life and accept that your journey is leading you to a different reality.  In Divorce Support Coaching, it’s my job to help you work through these painful emotions and maybe even embrace the new future ahead of you. Together, we will:

• Process any sadness or grief about the end of the relationship without unnecessary suffering.
• Acknowledge and heal from any feelings of shame, failure, or inadequacies related to the end of the relationship.
• Build your self-worth through actionable steps toward the future.
• Develop a new identity and sense of self, outside of the relationship.
• Identify what might be stopping you from fully creating your new life.

CREATE: LIFE AFTER DIVORCE

If you’ve ever gone through the grieving process, you know that the heaviness and sadness don’t last forever. The same goes for the end of a relationship. Once you’ve really processed through the difficult emotions that come along with divorce recovery, you are ready to see the opportunities before you. Though you may still be adjusting to this new reality, you might also feel a hint of excitement about what’s to come… a tiny glimmer of hope that you get to create a new life for yourself. When we work together, we will focus on this creation phase to help you reinvent yourself! Together we will:

• Learn to navigate life as a single person or a single parent, including self-care and life balance.
• Build a support system for yourself and if a parent for your children.
• Create an action plan to help you build the life you’ve always wanted and reconnect to the person you would like to be or who you may have lost in your marriage
• Work towards healthy, future relationships and understand any unhealthy patterns to avoid repeating them
• If you are in a new relationship, explore the nature of your new relationship and determine what you want that to look like.

You Can Do This

Without divorce recovery, you can feel alone and exhausted like you are running on empty. As your Divorce Coach, I will support you while decisions arise and your emotions get triggered. I will provide feedback and consultation pre, during, and post your divorce. I will be your fierce advocate, but also your accountability partner. Because I understand that everyone’s divorce situation is different and everyone’s needs are unique.

Connect with me today and let’s begin!

Rebuilding Life After Divorce Or Relationship Breakup: Creating Your Meaningful New Future

Learn how to process — and release — the uncomfortable feelings from your divorce or break up so you can let go of the past, embrace the wonderful person you are (and are becoming), and create an exciting new vision for the next chapter of your life — all in just 8 weeks!