You realize that the initial glow of your relationship faded.
You can tell your self-esteem is shattered. What you thought was once
the perfect relationship has left you feeling depleted, anxious and emotionally gutted.
Why did this happen? How did this happen?
They Were Charming… At First
You recall sharing with friends how you were “swept” off your feet or how you connected on a deeper level than ever before. Your friends were in awe when you showed them the generous gifts you were given and how much you were adored. Now, everything seems drastically different.
It may have happened slowly or suddenly but the dynamic in the relationship shifted and changed to criticism, “gaslighting”, anger, or shaming you. Now, you find yourself struggling with self-confidence. You feel like you are always doing something wrong. Your friends and family are trying to offer support, but they don’t know what to say or do. You feel lost. You may feel hopeful that the relationship will change, perhaps continuing in some form rather than leaving altogether, but you are feeling drained and defeated.
I understand. I have been there and have worked with many people with similar feelings and experiences. You do not have to feel this way and you are not alone.
You Know Something Is Wrong, But Can’t Identify It
Being in a relationship with a narcissist takes different shapes and levels, from some symptoms or “traits” of narcissism to a covert narcist to a pure narcissistic abuser. Often, we may not know exactly how extensive it really is. We have been in it for so long and we are not sure exactly what is going on, but we know something is taking its toll.
Sometimes, we may not want to accept it because of our own histories or needs. Therapy or counseling is not only important to receive support if you feel you may be in a relationship with a narcissist, but to process, heal and ensure that you do not repeat unhealthy patterns (hyperlink to my video).
Here are some red flags you may be or have been with a narcissist:
- Extreme jealousy about your other relationships or friendships
- Extreme rage or heightened emotional volatility for seemingly no reason
- Inability to accept feedback or criticism, but quick to criticize
- Little to no empathy or sensitivity to you or to others
- Acts aggressively to meet their own needs
- Expects you to praise them and “raise them up” constantly
- Expects constant attention from you
- Grandiosity with you or others
- Seems to have no guilt for tearing you down or making you feel bad
- Difficulty apologizing and taking responsibility for their words or actions
- A sense of panic when you try to set boundaries or end the relationship
Now What? Helping you move forward.
Recovering from narcissistic abuse can be challenging. You may not know you have been with a narcissist. Once you realize, it can be a shock. Being in a relationship with a narcissist can be debilitating to your self-worth, your self-awareness, and your trust in future relationships. You may not even fully trust yourself anymore or your perception of situations, fearing you might repeat old patterns.
I am passionate about helping you regain your confidence, rediscover who you are, and help you move forward positively in your life. At this time, it may seem hard to believe that you can trust again or rebuild from the experience. I am here to tell you otherwise.
This is the first step for your healthy future.
There are steps to the healing process. When we work together, we focus on taking action towards a better future and getting back to the confident self you may have lost along the way (or finding the confident self you never fully developed). During our partnership, we will work to identify the red flags — traits and behaviors — of narcissistic relationships so that you don’t find yourself in a similar relationship down the road. We will help you to rebuild your self-esteem and reconnect with YOU. We will better understand what took place – not to relive the past, but to use it as our barometer to deeply understand the roots of why this happened so that you can truly heal, rebuild and reclaim your life. During our process, you will find that you will be able to:
● Identify the red flags of a narcissist to ensure you do not repeat a similar relationship
● Learn self-care and reevaluate relationships
● Uncover childhood trauma that may have created being a victim or repeatedly drawing narcissists in your life
● Identify and set healthy boundaries
● Create healthy relationships
● Rebuild emotional strength
● Reconnect with your self-confidence, self-worth and thrive
Divorcing a Narcissist
Ending a relationship with a narcissist is complicated and only gets more complicated if you were married. Divorcing a narcissist is an incredibly challenging and difficult road, but one you can get through with the right tools. Narcissists want to be the one in control and will not take the news of you wanting to leave well, so make sure you have support. It is important to gather friends or family who can lift you up when your spouse is bringing you down. For professional support, my Divorce Recovery Coaching program can be blended with this Narcissistic Abuse Recovery support to guide you through the divorce process. You can learn more about my Divorce Recovery Coaching program here and read more about divorcing a narcissist here.
You Do Not Have To Do This Alone
I’m here to help you, whether you want to break up with a long-term partner who is a narcissist, divorce your narcissistic spouse, or break a pattern of dating people with narcissistic traits. Narcissistic partners have controlled your life long enough.
This next step isn’t about them – it’s about you. How you feel about yourself, how you take care of yourself, and how you learn to get your own needs met. I will walk with you as you heal the emotional wounds inflicted by these relationships, learn how to prioritize yourself and your own needs, and transform your life into something that brings you a sense of security and happiness. Contact me to get started.
Book A Consultation
Looking Forward To Meet You
I am excited to help you on your journey to happiness.
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