We all know someone who is overly positive and dismissive of our negative emotions. Maybe we’ve even been guilty of being toxically positivity ourselves. While positivity can be a helpful coping mechanism, toxic positivity can be harmful and dismissive of valid emotions. In this blog I’ll explain the concept of toxic positivity and provide five tips for dealing with it. Once we can recognize toxic positivity and know the tips for dealing with it, we can live a more fulfilling life. So, let’s dive in!
What is toxic positivity?
Toxic positivity is a belief that no matter how painful a situation is or how difficult, an individual should stay positive and be happy or grateful. Toxic positivity invalidates a person’s subjective experience, which is why it’s like gaslighting. I recently did a deep dive about Toxic Positivity with “Mind Body Green Health” that you can check out here. We know what toxic positivity is, now how do we deal with it in our lives? Here are five tips that will help you today.
Recognize that it’s okay to feel negative emotions
It’s important to understand that feeling negative emotions is a natural and normal part of being human. We all experience a range of emotions, and it’s important to acknowledge and validate our feelings, even if they aren’t positive.
Set boundaries
If someone is being overly positive and dismissing your negative emotions, it’s okay to set boundaries and communicate your needs. Let them know that you appreciate their positivity, but you also need space to process your feelings. If you are a people pleaser this step can be difficult, so I wrote a blog to help! You can check that out here.
Practice self-compassion
Be kind to yourself and give yourself permission to feel and express your emotions. Avoid judging yourself for feeling negative emotions or feeling like you should always be positive.
Surround yourself with supportive people
Seek out people who can validate your emotions and provide support when you’re going through a difficult time. Connect with people who can empathize with you and offer a listening ear.
Practice balanced thinking
Instead of focusing solely on positive or negative thoughts, try to practice balanced thinking. This means acknowledging both positive and negative aspects of a situation and avoiding black-and-white thinking.
In conclusion, toxic positivity can be harmful and dismissive of our valid emotions. While positivity can be helpful, it’s important to recognize the value of acknowledging and validating negative emotions. By recognizing it’s ok to feel negative emotions, setting boundaries, practicing self-compassion, surrounding ourselves with supportive people, and practicing balanced thinking, we can all learn to navigate the complexities of our emotional experiences in a healthy and positive way. Remember, it’s important to give ourselves permission to express and process those emotions. By following these five tips, we can all learn to find a healthy balance between positivity and authenticity and live a more fulfilling life. So go out there and embrace the full spectrum of your emotional experiences! If you’re struggling to stop being toxically positive or are navigating a relationship with someone who is, I can help. You can connect with me here. I’m here to help.
Babita Spinelli
Licensed Psychotherapist & Certified Coach.
